Tales from Absurdistan

Now that President Kibaki has officially declared his candidacy for a second term, I think we should call his attention to another promise he made in the run-up to the 2002 election. Appearing on NTV's StateCraft in September 2002, the late Michael Kijana Wamalwa explained how the National Party of Kenya (NAK) agreed on a single presidential candidate:

“It was hard to select the party's flagbearer. We all staked our claims with reasons. The reason that won the day was made by Kibaki after he made it clear he would be president for only one five-year term....Kibaki volunteered that proposal.”

So not only did the President turn his back on his LDP colleagues, having previously discarded the MoU that was the basis for their support of his candidature, he has now also cuckolded his erstwhile partners in the NAK. Whatever else one may say about him, he is an equal opportunity conman.

Moving on, the BBC reports:

A hospital building programme in South Africa has been put back, to help pay for the football World Cup which the country is hosting in 2010. Two hospitals in the remote Northern Cape have been told their buildings will be delayed because of cuts in government spending. The rising cost to South Africa of hosting the World Cup is beginning to take its toll on government spending. A new 200-bed hospital in De Aar is to be delayed - so is another in Upington. A spokeswoman for the Northern Cape health department, Shelley Fielding, said money had been diverted to prepare for 2010.

Now many South Africans who were dying to host the event will literally get their wish.

Associated Press reports:

An Australian man said he is considering suing national carrier Qantas for refusing to let him onto an international flight because he would not take off a T-shirt calling U.S. President George W. Bush a terrorist. Allen Jasson said on Monday he was turned away last Friday at a Qantas departure gate in the southern city of Melbourne when he tried to board a flight to London while wearing a shirt with the a picture of Bush and the slogan "World's #1 terrorist." Qantas Airways Ltd. said in a statement: "Whether made verbally or on a T-shirt, comments with the potential to offend other customers or threaten the security of a Qantas group aircraft will not be tolerated."

It doesn't bode well for passengers aboard Qantas if a message on a T-shirt constitutes a threat to the security of the aircraft. What's next? Suicide Bumper Stickers?

Staying Down-Under, CNN tells of some private investigators who may have landed the ultimate gig:

Sydney officials have paid private detectives thousands of dollars to have sex with prostitutes to gather evidence needed to shut down illegal brothels, a newspaper reported Sunday. Nine local councils have paid private investigators a total of 25,000 Australian dollars (US$19,740) over the past three years to go undercover and root out the illicit trade, according to The Sunday Telegraph newspaper. Nick Ebbeck, the mayor of Kuringai council, which has reportedly spent A$7,000 (US$5,520) in the past month employing detectives to have sex with prostitutes, said extreme measures were necessary. "We have to employ private investigators to actually go through with the act and come up with reports that will suffice in a court process," he was quoted as saying. "On numerous occasions over numerous days and times they had to fulfill the act."

The term "private dick" just got a whole new meaning. 'Nuff said!